Dark's speech
by Darkschick
Summary: Dark's had something he's wanted to say for a long time. It's been needed to say. I've had to listen to this every time he sees a fan girl's fan fic.
1. Dark's Speech

{Fan girls - an annoying girl who takes obviously straight characters and makes them gay with people that would never happen even UF the character was gay. Example: Sasuke and his brother, and Dark and Daisuke.}

Dark: Okay, my name's Dark Mousy and I have something I've wanted to say for a while. This message goes out to all Fan girls everywhere. I AM NOT GAY! I don't even possible understand where you could get this idea into your brain-dead heads. I have never shown even the slightest bit of romantic interest in Daisuke or Hiwatari! And Krad's the freak that likes ME! I swear to GOD, you idiots, when you 'read' the manga would you ACTUALLY READ it! I've said under multiple occasions how hot woman are and how I don't want a thing to do with men! For example: when those policewoman tackled me, I said "If they'd get woman to tackle me, I wish they'd get sexier ones" So please point out exactly when I made the slightest appearance of being gay!

And another thing; even IF I was gay, how the hell would I even be able to get a relationship going with Daisuke? WE SHARE THE SAME F-ING BODY! And Hiwatari? Come on! Really, the guy doesn't even have emotion, I could so much better. But again: NOT GAY. And Krad…. COME OFF IT! When did I tackle him to the ground? NEVER! That was ALWAYS him! And side note he used to be a girl, says so in the manga. Word for word.

Random Fan girl: Oh don't lie Dark we can all see your love for Daisuke.

Dark: Grr! Hey Daisuke! Come here!

{Daisuke enters and looks questioningly at Dark.}

Daisuke: Do you want something Dark?

{Dark pulls out a blade from nowhere and runs it through Daisuke's body. The boy falls to the ground in a lifeless heap}

Dark: Would someone who loved him do that?

Random Fan girl: Well, you were probably pissed because he's been spending so much time with Hiwatari and that's who you really love.

Dark: {eye twitch} You idiotic….

{Dark pulls his blade up and runs off, finding Hiwatari and kills him as well.}

Dark: There! Now he and Krad are dead!

{Fan girl is silent}

Dark: Now, back to what I was saying. About the two girls, Risa and Riku, I LIKE RIKU. I don't care what the anime says, it's retarded. There's a kidnapping unicorn in it! So obviously it has nothing to do with the Manga. Manga came first so it's the real one. I don't even know why Yukiru Sagasaki made me always falling in love with middle school kids…. But she did…. And it was RIKU! Not Risa! I only got really pissed that Argentine kidnapped her because he stole from ME!

Random Fan girl: No you didn't, you really love her.

Dark:…. Fine….

{Dark pulls up his sword and walks off again}

An hour later:

Dark: there! I've killed everybody! No one's alive except me! …. Now we can start over. Finally!

{Pauses for a minute}

Dark: I'm going to go get a drink….

{Walks off}


	2. Dark's Retort

{note: The rant was not posted as a story. I posted it on fanfic because that is where the fan girls are. It was meant for a message to them. They would not see it if it was on some random forum. I put in the summary that it wasn't a story. So if that fact pisses you off, don't click on the damn story. Another reason I didn't put it on a forum is because it was not meant to be MY view. If you going to post about how MY view is wrong or "close-minded" at least understand what's going on. The 'Story' was from Dark's point of view, not mine! I clearly stated "this is DARK" not me. It was DARK overreacting to being made gay by people. So Dark will now respond to your own overreactions to his overreaction}

Dark: Ok you people need to back off of my author. You guys have serious overreactions to something that's not that big of a deal. So some little fan girl has sent her a very nice reply. And I am going to respond to it today. Or tonight, whenever you read this. Okay, starting off. You're…technically… right. There is nothing preventing me from being bisexual {shudder} but if you're going to jump down my author's throat about not posting actual facts about the Krad thing, Then why don't you post some evidence that would even slightly hint to my being Bi. And uh… the cover of volume 11? Really? Are you mental? That is NOT a 'close/cuddly' picture of me and Daisuke. If you look at my face, I do NOT look all happy and cuddly! Me and my author asked ten or twelve people about this. (some were fans, and some had never even heard of DNAngel) And all of them said that, although DAISUKE looks happy, I look like I'm about to kill him. And I'm sure you've seen lots of close/cuddly pictures because we've seen tons of those too; however, those are not in the MANGA those are just pictures! They aren't part of the actual story; therefore, they have no relevance!

Me: I would like to point out that yes, Dark COULD still love Daisuke because those are emotions however-

Dark: However, I never even said how can I **love** Daisuke because we share the same body. I said: "even IF I was gay, how the hell would I even be able to get a relationship going with Daisuke? WE SHARE THE SAME F-ING BODY! " I said how would there be a RELATIONSHIP not LOVE learn how to read before you post replies! {turns to the side, breathing heavily for air}

Me: And about the whole "Consistency" thing. Yes, Dark did call Daisuke into the room when I just said they shared the same body. But again, the rant was not under the same circumstances as the story. The rant was a message, so Dark could have done anything he wanted. He could have turned the air off and laughed as everyone else chocked.

And (while Dark gasps for air, I will continue) I love how you pointed out the fact that you believe Satoshi to be gay without a doubt. And I still haven't COMPLETELY decided my own opinion about that, but I do think he cares deeply for Daisuke; however, I'm not sure about the love thing yet. It never states that Satoshi's reason for transforming is the same as Daisuke's. Love may not be why Satoshi changes, maybe it's just when he shows emotion, because he very rarely does that for anyone but Daisuke.

Dark: And while we are both completely ECSTATIC about the fact that you can read Japanese, that is still translation and it still losses something, so Yay for you and your reading ability, but it serves no real point! Oh and the whole "Yours sincerely, a fan of the DarkxDaisukexSatoshi threesome" You think I don't know that was to piss us off. You cocky little son of a-

Me: Dark! Anyway, thank you for responding, I always enjoy fan girls' overreactions. I Love how you all find it awful that Dark killed everyone. But I assure you, they are still alive somewhere out there.

Dark: what? You lied to me?

Me: And Dark did that because Dark overreacts in his own character. In the manga he freaks out all the time about small stuff. And someone posted about how towards the end, Dark swaps to liking Risa. I don't think he did. He freaked out when Argentine kidnaps her because Argentine STOLE from DARK. That's why he wanted to kill him so bad, that and combined with Daisuke's own feelings of anger it doesn't seem like he cares about Risa to me. Maybe I'm wrong, but too bad. That's how I view the manga, don't try to change my view.

Dark: My idiot author can't respond to the 'krad being a girl' thing, right now because her idiotic-ness caused her to-

Me: I lent my manga to someone, she said she was almost done, so when I get it back, I promise to quote that part. Maybe it didn't say Word-for-word like Dark said but-

Dark: It was implied!

Me:….yeah…. What he said. But anyway, DARK IS HETROSEXUAL! NOT HOMOSEXUAL! NOT BISEXUAL!

Dark: Not KRAD-sexual, or DAISUKE-sexual

Both: AND NOT IN DENIAL ABOUT LOVE INTERESTS!

{Pause for heavy-breathing}

Me: I'm sorry you reacted to his over reaction so deeply, but I'm really sorry, I may not be Dark's creator but I am kind of protective over him. Technically I don't have a reason to be, but me and my friend have been writing a DNAngel fanfic that's lasted for a year and a half. And every character in there I'm overprotective of. And I'm so sorry that I offended you with my opinion.

Dark: Don't apologize to them! They don't deserve it! You wrote me in an EPIC story with LOVE HATE SEX and PAIN in it, they'll just be jealous when you post it. {Runs off to continue scene on story} can we do another sex scene?

Me: *sigh* anyway, please post if you have any high over reactions. They're fun to laugh about with my friends


End file.
